Happy Friday Romancers! I’ve been so underwater at work that I completely missed that we had a Pride festival of sorts this year in DC. I really need to prioritize taking the kids next June. It’s one of the BEST celebrations in our city for sure! Evie graduated from KINDERGARTEN this week and I don’t think I can handle the fact that she is headed to first grade this next year. That sounds SO old. I remember first grade!!! Eep. Time is flying as usual – somehow June is almost over, and that means half of 2021 is going with it :( How do I make things slow down!?
Hoping to find some time to relax and slow down … some day.
We always knew our wedding would be a small and intimate affair. Getting married meant something to us many might not understand. It was well after college when the US government legalized LGBTQ marriages, legalized our love, and union. The first detail we knew before anything else was the date— March 14th, Pi Day. Between the two of us, you have a baking enthusiast and an engineer, so Pi was something special to us. And you know, Pi is forever. After that all the details fell into place.
We looked at museums we liked for a location, but finally decided to get married on the steps of the Library of Congress. With our love of books and the picturesque surroundings, it made the most sense for us. We put miniature lemons and roses with rainbow ribbons in our boutonnières and pins for our small entourage of guests, donned our blue and turquoise suits, and carried our rainbow flag with us. We wanted to not spare an expense here and had our suits made special for us by the Tailory. They specialize in queer fashion and suits. We chose special details for them, like my leafy plant suit lining and 3.14.2020 embroidered inside of the jackets. My partner’s suit was a navy blue with lavender lining details (their favorite colors) and mine a darker turquoise with the leafy lining details.
What happened next made the day feel even more historic. The afternoon before, DC began to close down due to the spread of COVID-19. We woke up very early that Saturday morning and drove into an empty DC. Our friends had kept referring to our special day as, “Love in the Time of Corona” (but with a happier ending). One even attended wearing a Renaissance-inspired, plague doctor mask. Few to no people were around the area, except for a roving journalist or two, and us. We stood on the terrace of the Library of Congress and began.
Our ceremony was brief, but we wanted to share that moment with all of our friends across the world or who couldn’t be there. We had a Live Stream running of our ceremony, when a loud siren began blaring all around us. An emergency PSA sounded in the middle of our vows and we paused, laughed, and waited. The whole thing felt very dystopian and significant, and looking at each other, hands joined, it was perfect. Afterwards, we took photos around the emptied city, waving our rainbow flag between us in front of the Capitol.
We had a small luncheon with about 10 friends – our matriarch, we call them, at one’s home. Glass jars with a rainbow ribbon, filled with a pack of flower seeds, corked test tubes of sakura green tea, and heart shaped tea strainers were our favors to guests and friends. We had tea and homemade foods from our friends, and took photos sword fighting in the front yard. Our host also made us our wedding cake, a simple almond sponge cake with powdered sugar, and topped with fresh delicate roses. Sitting there with them, I realized that almost 80 years later I was having a wedding much like my grandmother did. A small and intimate gathering of our closest friends and found family in someone’s home during a historic time. My grandmother died the year before at 101 years old. I think we would have admired and laughed over the similarities between our weddings. Our friend’s home was borrowed, our suits were blue, my grandmother’s love was old, and mine was new.
What was most special was that we COULD get married, that it was legalized. We love each other and that’s all we want to be able to do. People forget that when they get wrapped up in politics. At the end of the day, think of the people who just want to live peacefully and happily. That’s all we want. There’s plenty of advice out there on how to plan a wedding. My advice— It’s your day. Make it about you and your love. And don’t forget you can keep celebrating every day after that. We planned to have parties and gatherings months after our ceremony, but things became a little complicated with the pandemic.